Biological oddities

I'm not a "normal" guy. I mean ... I am. I'm somo sapiens sapiens.

However, I've been through a couple of odd experiences through my life so far.

First of all - I don't have a regular blood supply. I have blood. I have blood vessels. I don't have a beating heart though. What I have is a mechanical heart. It mimics a regular pulse, which fools most systems. I've been told, that my heart is powered by about 10 grams of anti-matter, and that the containment field is connected to my biological processes. As in "I die, I blow up". I kinda hope that isn't true, as 10 grams of anti-matter anihilating would be about as powerfull as a 200 kTon nuclear explosion. Obviously I haven't tried this out, but I do seem to be emitting gamma-rays.

My blood isn't quite normal either. It does have blood in it, but only 75% of my blood is actual blood.

One percent is made up of maintenance nanobots. These keep my blood free of toxins, poisons, viruses, bacteria, fungi etc. Very cool, but also means I can't get drunk or even high. Not so cool. 

On a somewhat related note, I have a fairly high amount of naonbots swarming my body at all times. These repair tissue damage fairly rapidly. Cut out a pound of flesh and it'll be back inside of 24 hours. Cut off a finger and it won't grow back - that was a stupid experiment.

Then there's a sort of organic silver compound - not sure what it is or even how it works, I just know that lycanthropes really hate getting my blood on them. This makes up about 10%,

Aparently part of my blood is holy water. Not sure why, but I suspect it might be related to a whole month of my memory that I'm missing. This makes up about 15%.

The rest of my blood (about 10%) seems to be some kind very effective oxygen carrier. I tried testing just how long I could hold my breath under water, but after roughly an hour I was shivering with cold and not in a mood for continuing.

As I said - I'm a bit weird

Conquests

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I have attached a picture of what I look like. This was taken at the end of a four month trek across a mix of deserts, shrublands and plains.. Was in the dry season so quite a lot of dust in the air. This is also why I am not smiling in this picture.

In case you're wondering, the picture is taken on the outskirts of a small town called Qhi'nu*Kjh. Do not ask me to pronounce that name. I have enough problems with the ' and * sounds, let along how to pronounce Kjh. All I know is they had bath houses, spas, and lots and lots of fresh water. And well trained slave girls who were quite expert when it came to full body massages, scrub downs and the like.

Anyway - not smiling in this picture. You try walking around in >30° C temperatures (86F), sand and dust flying everywhere, bloody annoying tiny insects getting into every imaginable (and unimaginable I might add with a rather annoyed face) orifice. Tiny insects who's only purpose seems to be to leave semi permanent colours on everything they touch. Usually I have a fairly clean smile. Not Colgate white like those zombies from Hollywood, but a nice, clean, natural white smile. After two weeks in that gods forsaken area I had purple teeth. Purple.

Try to imagine a sort of flourescent Barney colour. Purple! Then have that stain your teeth, unable to get it out for several months, having to get a dentist to bleach your teeth four times to get the colour out. Four times! If I had known that before this picture was taken, I'd be angry in that picture instead of just annoyed.

Physical description

Quite often in my dealings with others, there have been some incorrect assumptions about me, my size, weight ... all that stuff.

So, let's break out the rulers.

Sizes

First of all - my height.

Barefoot, straight back I stand 198 cm tall (6' 6" for those from the US).

My "wingspan" is 208 cm (6' 10")

I weigh 105 kg (231 lbs) which, technically, makes me overweight, but since I am very well trained, the 12 or so kg of fat I'm carrying around is quite acceptable.

My chest is 108 cm around (3' 7"), my hip is 98 cm (3' 3")

Generally speaking I am a big guy.

I even wear a size 48½ shoe (14), and you all know what you say about guys who wear big shoes, right? We have big feet.

This, of course, brings us to "it". Mr. Johnson. The One Eyed Wonder Worm. The Blue Cyclops. My cock. I feel I must dispell quite a lot of rumours about its size. Most of these seem to stem from women not being entirely certain how to measure, not having a proper sense of size etc. Much of this is obviously because the boys they've played with earlier have no idea how to measure, or are entirely too embarrased and insecure to actually want them to know.So - girls, women and boys - here's the proper way to measure the size of a cock:

1. Make sure the guy is standing upright
2. Make sure it's fully errect - or as errect as it can get. Pull the foreskin back (if there is any)
3. Measure from the upper part of the root (the side closest to the belly button). We only want usable length.
4. Bend the cock (or lift it) to horizontal (or as close as it will go). Measure the distance from the root to the tip.
5. Don't pull on it, etc.

This gives you the usable length of his cock. Some will pull on it to make it look longer, but that has no real effect - it's not like she'll be able to feel that illusion later on anyway. In fact there's a very nice guide for it here.

As for mine - it's 16.8 cm long (6.6") and 15.2 cm in circumfrence (5.98"). That's slightly longer than average, quite a bit thicker than average. But, guys, want to know a secret? You know who Ron Jeremy is, right? His cock is WAY bigger (24.8 cm/9.75") and his rather candid thought on the subject is, to the best of my memory: "I've gotten more girls off with my tongue than my cock". It's not about what you have between your legs - it's about what's between your ears. You cannot give a girl an orgasm without using your brain, nor without using hers.

Visuals

I have rather fair skin and hair. This doesn't always show though. Not all my wanderings allow me ready access to bathing, and with lots of dust in my hair I will seem to have very dark hair. Dirt and gime will, of course, give me a rather tanned look as well.

I have several scars. I say several because I have no idea just how many I have. I have a nice mesh on my back that were made with a cat o' nine tails with small metal tallons on the ends.

I have at least thirty stab wounds that I can see, but I don't remember how I got more than seven of them.

I've been gored twice, on two difference occations - you'd think I'd have learned not to taunt a bull the first time.

I'm supposed to have some burn marks on my back, but I can't really verify that on my own. Some of them round as if made by cigarettes, some of them in odds twisty waves as if burned by a liquid. I cannot remember getting any of those.

I'll refrain from commenting on my usual outfit for now. Parts of the outfit are worthy of an entry on their own.